Tag Archives: influence

Loneliness in the crowd

Recently I’ve been feeling a bit low and sad although perhaps an improvement over what I have felt in the not so long ago past. But what concerned me the most were the people around me. This is a little post on this.

People often influence what you do. Also when you want connection you usually seek it from people .So many people who are dulled out and that I find it hard to relate with. There are many people who are not worth spending time with and don’t really contribute to anything plus probably wouldn’t be able to relate to me either. Especially where I am at now (where people are even duller and seem to have a lack) the people I am required to associate with are often a drag on me and not a very good role models either.

The feeling of loneliness in the crowd is real. But the feeling that bugs me the most is that one of rejection. When you feel unwanted.

I do think to myself, right well don’t overthink all this just accept it. But having to deal with it all the time does make me sorta want to hide from the world further. I’ve already dealt with similar feelings in the past but it does get to me this, because I do try and reach out to people, but when that isn’t accepted it sorta bounces back to you as a feeling of disappointment. And each time I probably lose more composure and feel worse though the upside is more resilience (and my secondary school used to repeat over and over).

I suppose though challenges in life are good to some extent. But I guess isolation is after a while lonely especially when you don’t have other things to occupy you and after a while losing touch with things.

I’d say what is important though is finding connection to the self and enjoying life.

The opportunities and freedom you gain being alone are great. Like taking a quiet walk, observing things that others might not notice and going to places you want to go to.Sure there are missed opportunities with not being with people I suppose but you know if the people you could of been with are not worth it you probably aren’t missing anything and often people put up a facade. If drinking, doing drugs, listening to loud music are your game then  I rather not be involved.

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Language affects the way you think

Language is thought to affect the way you think. I question whether there are enough words to express how I am truly feeling or thinking and if speaking English enforces certain ways of thinking on yourself and others.

There was an experiment in which (to roughly describe) people who could speak both Japanese and English were interviewed twice came up with different answers for the same question. {If you are interested you may like to google it.} This suggests that there is a certain views attached to the language already.

This experiment I think is less likely to work on other languages (although it may still work between an a more western country vs more eastern country) since Japan has quite a unique culture, being an island nation and it being very isolated this perhaps this makes the language quite different from many. Also Japanese as a language is more limited in terms of certain kinds words such as it not having a proper word for no for use in everyday situations just a more ambiguous word for no. The more important/common words in the language may effect how the person thinks and says, almost like the culture is inbuilt into the language.

I guess this language limitation is something that occasionally bothers me, I often try to think sentences out a lot or make up words and at extreme times mess up my grammar on purpose for no reason (or probably just for fun or because I’m bored or something like that.)

Slang is a way to add some more interest to your sentences. Because those words are quite interesting or expressive you could say ha ha although they sound better mostly when younger people use it. Also you can borrow words from other languages or use other languages within your language too to improve it. English as a language has it pros and cons but I guess as a language that I’m used to it is okay and quite cool even though there a many unnecessary grammar rules.

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photo credit: Niecieden via photopin cc